Drink me

What the HELL is wrong with me? I was supposed to drink 2 of the below shown small bottles of barium for my CT test this afternoon. I drank about half of the first bottle and began to vomit. So now I sit waiting for the radiologist to call me back after she tries to reach my doc to find out what they want me to do. I'm just going to quit trying to have tests. I'll just let it go unchecked until it kills me. If it is the same thing as before and it grows as slowly as the doc said then I should have several years left. I just give up...