So last weeks message was, yay for friday...this week...I'm an idiot. I truly am. I just spent the past 10 minutes or so doing something I said I would not do again and being miserable while I was doing it. Which by the way, one should never feel 'miserable' while doing. If you've read the blog before you can probably guess what I just did. No, it wasn't playing poker...it was "time" with 'T'. I really shouldn't have...and really wish I hadn't. It wasn't even any fun. Actually it felt more like a chore, like mowing the yard or sweeping the floor than fun. Maybe if I can just remember how it felt this time then next time I'm asked I'll say NO. I must learn to say NO to him. He is so bad for me and it isn't like he loves me or anything. Sometimes I don't think he even likes me. So why...why do I continue to be with a man that doesn't love me and has no intentions of ever taking what you could never call a relationship anywhere? Because, dear people... I ... am ... an ... idiot.